Bursting the Bubble

I've always meant for this blog to be an honest account of this year and I think today I've gotten a dose of more honesty than perhaps I wanted.  This morning I picked up the results of a survey completed by most of my students about my class.  As I read through the tabulated responses, and then the comments, I felt as though my bubble had just been burst and immediately began to feel myself ready to go on the defensive.  I know that I am good at what I do and I work very hard to provide my students with engaging, interesting lessons about science.  I also try to connect with them in whatever ways I can and support them as they learn about science and how to do this high school thing (I teach 9th graders all day).  I suppose I should put things in perspective...a majority of the feedback I received was really positive, but it's that handful of negative comments that hurts most.  It doesn't matter which students these responses came from, I just know that I need to eat this slice of humble pie and try to do better next year.  With that in mind, there are three weeks until I say good-bye to my current group of students and I have some finals to prepare for.


This is a sort of addendum to my post, written two days later...
Since I've had a very relaxing weekend with lots of time to ponder these darn surveys, here's where I'm at right now on this subject.  I realized that in the intensity and fury of this year, there are things that I have really neglected in my classroom and with my students and times where I just pushed through rather than stopping to see how things were going with the kids.  One kid wrote that I am moody and I suppose there are a good number of days where I'm feeling really rushed and stressed so that's how I come across.  I knew after I came back from Venice that I'm not always the Queen of Nice (especially when working with some students who are less than pleasant to deal with, or ninth grade craziness) and I have really tried to work on this.  Another student noted that I need to control my class better (I laughed at this because after teaching ninth graders for 5 years in the States, I have a definite vision of what chaos in a classroom looks like and these kids don't hold a candle to my craziest class).  One said that they hated that we deviate from learning science too often.  Yes, I know that there are times where I let discussions go off topic because we've stumbled across something interesting...science related or not.  I've learned that those "off topic" opportunities are where I find out the most about kids' interests.  My classes are not challenging enough for some and we move too fast for others.  I don't give enough extra credit, or the opportunities are too easy or unfair.  I think I have just had a vision of what raising a family is really like...you never can please everyone no matter what you do, and I have to come to a point where I'm okay with that.  


The comments that I took most to heart, and am still reflecting on, were the responses centered around questions asking whether the students feel that their teacher treats them fairly AND another that asked if the students feel their teacher respects them.  Several students disagreed, or worse, strongly disagreed.  Some wrote that I favored some students and not others.  This is always a struggle because there are always going to be students that I connect with easily and some that are difficult to connect with at all.  I was pretty much always the kid that connected easily with my teachers because I totally dug the school thing--yes, I was a nerd and I liked the success I found at school.  I'm not ashamed to admit that a few of my close friends today were once my teachers.  These were people that I liked and respected and who blessed me with their support and mentoring.  While I don't see my current students as "friends", I know there are some who I'll probably still be in touch with after we part ways and I think that's pretty cool. 

I found this picture hidden behind another in a photo fame earlier this year.  It was taken on my last day of high school with my chemistry teacher (who is still one of my close friends).

 So, my biggest challenges/places for improvement for next school year are these:    
1) To work on really connecting with every kid in some way (I have a million ideas of how to do this and can't wait to start trying them out).
2) To be sure my expectations for achievement in my class, and my expectations about the social and emotional abilities of my students, are fair but kept high so that they always have something to strive for.
3) To get more sleep and be on my game with planning so that I'm not feeling frantic every minute of every day or exhausted and cranky.
4) To work on giving my students genuine praise and feedback that will support them as learners and help them to work on their weaknesses.  Interestingly enough, I just had a conversation with one of my students who is bright but not particularly motivated in some of his classes.  He told me that he was having a hard time because he felt that no matter how hard he worked or how good the quality of his work was he never received the positive affirmation he needed to keep him on track and moving forward.  He said that he often felt that no matter what he did, it just wasn't good enough so he stopped trying so hard and just did enough to get by (at which time his teachers scolded him for not putting forth enough effort and wasting his potential).
5) To realize that no matter what, I am not perfect and I will never be the perfect teacher for every student.  I have to keep doing what I do best and make adjustments as necessary.  There is something that I have chosen to keep from my students--the fact that 90% of the time I feel like hell.  There is nothing forgiving about IBS and sometimes it is pretty darn difficult to strap on a smile when it feels like my digestive system has been turned inside out.  Maybe I just need to let the kids know when I'm having a rough day...perhaps they'd understand.


Working with teenagers is such a challenging, amazing, crazy job--I guess I don't realize how much impact I can have on their lives until they are given a chance to tell me.  Being a pretty sensitive chick, I take what they have to say to heart.  To close out the year I'm going to have my students fill out the "Science Legacy" forms that I'll read to next year's incoming students during the first week of school.  I've done it every year since I started teaching and I think the advice the outgoing kids have for the newbies (especially the outgoing ninth graders words of wisdom to the incoming freshmen) is priceless.  I tend to get some pretty funny responses...perhaps I'll post a few:).       

A Musical Interlude in Seoul

I was doing a quick budget update and it came to my attention how much cash I've spent at the i-Tunes store since I moved to Seoul.  I'm sure some people would think this is ridiculous, but I can totally justify these purchases because there have been many days in the past nine months where I have relied on my i-Tunes playlist to get me through whatever is going on in life.  I put on Eva Cassidy's "Kathy's Song" or "Good Mother" by Jann Arden when I need to soothe an anxious spirit, Sara Bareilles or P!nk when I want an in-your-face sort of tune, ABBA when I feel like dancing around, Third Day or Phil Wickham when I want to feel more connected to God, and anything popular from the 80's when I just need a pick me up.  When my students are working in the lab or completing an assignment, we've got the iPod plugged in and I'm always amazed what sort of tunes they request!  Since I'm always open to new suggestions and I will download almost anything that speaks to me (regardless of the genre) my playlist has become pretty eclectic and I've definitely established a list of favorites that I can put on repeat and enjoy over and over.

Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.  ~Victor Hugo  

A little over a month ago I was surfing the Internet to see what sort of concerts might be happening in Portland this summer and I came across something even better--a concert in Seoul!  Many of my colleagues (and students) have already become part of the concert scene here in Seoul.  They've been to see The Eagles, Phil Collins, Erik Clapton, Corinne Bailey Rae, Taylor Swift, and others I probably haven't even heard of.  I hadn't really been tempted by any of the aforementioned options, but when I found out Sara Bareilles (one of my aforementioned go-to artists) would be doing a concert in Seoul--and better yet in Hongdae which is literally ten minutes away from where I live--I jumped right on it.  Getting tickets can be a little tricky because the website is entirely in Korean, but when my friend Jenny James jumped on board with me she used her connections at school to get us hooked up. 

Last night was the big night and we were both super excited.  Just a side note:  I think it's moderately hilarious that there is another "James" from Oregon here at SFS and even better that we have the same taste in music!  Sometimes the students ask if we're related...I think I'm just going to start saying yes:).  We headed out to Hongdae half an hour before the show was supposed to start and after a little trial and error found the venue called the V-Hall.  We descended down several flights of stairs (we joked that it would make a pretty good bomb shelter) and joined a roomful of Sara B. fans.  I've been to a few big name concerts in the States so the venue is usually an arena packed full of stadium style seats.  At first glance I figured out this was NOT the case.  There were maybe 5 rows of seats along the back wall...the rest was standing room only.  It ended up working out pretty well because once you hear Sara Bareilles break into song it is pretty much impossible to pass up the temptation to get into the music and do a little dancing!  

The venue--a single room sort of deal which made for a warm and cozy evening.

The two Miss James's waiting for the concert to start!

Her opening act was adorable, as in a total hottie!  I hadn't heard of Javier Dunn before I bought the concert tickets, but he's quite a talented guy and entertained us with four or five songs alone with his guitar.  I'll definitely be looking him up on i-Tunes!  A little before 8pm, Sara Bareilles came on.  She bounded out on the stage with her flipcam in hand to film the crowd.  From my vantage point, I saw mostly foreigners in the audience with a smattering of Koreans, but I would have been interested to see the sea of faces from the stage.  I can tell you for sure that there are some crazy Korean fans--a prime example would be the brick wall of a Korean man who stood squarely in front of us and kept migrating backward into my small bubble of personal space as he swayed (with eyes closed) to the music. 

Javier Dunn, the opening act!

Cute and talented!

Sara Bareilles at the piano singing 'Uncharted'.  It's a fabulous song!

Sara took a break from the piano and called up guest piano player Phil from her band.  We loved Phil!

Jenny and I post concert.

We were thinking we should have hung around and stalked the band...but we didn't!

The only downside about the concert was that it was way too short!  I wish Sara B. had played longer--she was truly incredible to watch and listen to.  I've noticed more and more in recent years that there are lots of musical artists who sound great when you buy their cd but when you hear them live they are totally disappointing.  Sara Bareilles sounds amazing live, has a great band, and infuses her outgoing and cheeky personality into the show!  The girl sings, plays the piano brilliantly, plays guitar, and writes her own music.  I only wish I was going to be home in Portland on July 19th to catch her concert at the Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall.  Here's a few videos I shot with my camera to give you a flavor of what I saw...

Sara Bareilles singing 'King of Anything'...it's a great in your face sort of tune!

The finale to the concert was Sara on the piano without the band singing 'Gravity'

It's funny how something like going to a concert can make you feel a little more connected to the place you live.  I love how life here is not really a novelty anymore...I really feel like I have a very "normal" existence in Seoul much like I had living in Spokane (more on this idea of "normalcy" later).  While I'm still on the topic of music, if anyone is interested in joining me at the Oregon Zoo on July 30th, I'm going to see Brandi Carlile.  This is the song that first caught my attention, and I've been a fan since I heard it because it seemed to speak to what I was feeling being thousands of miles away from home...

Keep on rockin' and check back soon for more updates from Seoul!

Heart Stopping Memories of Ho Chi Minh

Monday and Tuesday flew by and before we knew it we were heading for the airport on Tuesday evening!  Both mornings we were up early to get ready and eat breakfast before taking a 40 minute taxi ride from District 5 to District 2 where our course was held.  The International School of Ho Chi Minh City is situated in a very wealthy area and is a lovely campus.  We met some interesting folks who teach IGCSE Coordinated Science during our two days and learned lots of practical strategies, tips, and tricks from our wonderful presenter.  All-in-all, the course alone was worth the trip to Vietnam!


When our class ended on Monday we made a trip back to both tailors to see how our garments were shaping up.  At our first stop we found that my dress was looking pretty good, but the same couldn't be said for Ruth's trousers.  The seamstress had successfully made one pair of pants, but somehow misjudged the amount of material required for the second pair and came up short by the equivalent of an entire leg!  After a great deal of haggling, Ruth convinced the woman working in the shop to send the tailor back to the market to get more of the fabric that they had already cut to finish the trousers.  Amazing enough, they agreed.  We then rushed off to the second shop to see how the silk dresses that Steph and I were having custom made were shaping up.  Mine was too small and Steph's wasn't finished.  Not exactly the outcome we were hoping for.  


Already frustrated, tired, and hungry we left the shop to look for a taxi back to the hotel.  Until this point we had been careful to take only VinaSun taxis (a reputable taxi firm) and had absolutely no problems.  Tonight we spotted a taxi van with a logo from the same company the school had called for us and decided to go for it.  There were three men standing outside the taxi and when we caught their attention they waved us over.  We presented the driver with the hotel address and asked for the meter to be turned on (if you don't ask for the meter to be used you are at the mercy of the taxi driver to determine a price for you).  From the get-go things didn't feel right.  Our driver was taking his sweet time to get going and stopped a couple of times near the market to converse with other drivers and get cash from someone.  Finally we were off.  A few minutes into the ride Stephanie commented that the meter had just tripled when we hit a distance mark.  We had all seen the driver flip something on top of the meter when we got in, but didn't really think much of it.  Since the meter was turned away from Ruth, she couldn't really see what was happening but we had a clear view from the back seat.  We continued to watch the meter roll up and up to the point where the cost was more than double what the taxi ride should have cost us...and we were only halfway back to the hotel.  For most of the ride I didn't recognize the businesses and landmarks around me, so I felt a bit more at ease when I started seeing some of Chinatown's more distinctive features appear.  We all agreed that the best way to handle the situation was for all of us to get out of the taxi in front of the hotel where we would pay a fair rate for the taxi ride.  We knew the bellman would back us up and provide assistance if needed.  Unfortunately this plan was thwarted when our driver refused to take us to the drop off spot in front of the hotel.  Ruth asked him to pull over to which he responded by screaming in her face.  Not a good sign!  We were rolling up near the shopping center and all I could think to do was bail out at the first chance we got.  As we slowed, I tried the door handle and we quickly discovered that the doors and windows of the cab were locked.  This was an "Oh crap!" moment if ever there was one.  My survival instincts kicked in immediately and I yelled to Steph, "Bang on the windows and scream as loud as you can!  Someone has to hear us!".  That is EXACTLY what we did.  I pounded on that window with my fists and screamed "LET US OUT!"  Apparently the driver got the idea because we finally came to a stop and suddenly I could open the door.  I jumped out as fast as I could and all I could think was that I needed to find help NOW!  Steph and Ruth quickly followed and we loudly instructed our driver to meet us in front of the hotel if he wanted to get paid.  He got out of the taxi (another Oh Crap moment) and screamed, "Pay me!".  At that point, the flight mechanism kicked in for all three of us and we ran toward our hotel.  When we reached the lobby we were all visibly shaken and I could feel my heart pounding uncontrollably.  Although we were probably not in any imminent danger, it was certainly a harrowing experience that could have turned bad very quickly, especially if any one of us had been going through this experience alone.  After we calmed down and ordered dinner we discussed the silent plans each of us had formed if the taxi driver had not let us out of the taxi.  I had conjured up images of using my laptop to break out a window, or better yet to hit the taxi driver over the head if the need arose.  Ruth had planned to have Steph and I grab the driver from the back and try to distract/restrain him while she grabbed the keys.  Other very extreme ideas surfaced and thankfully we were able to have a good laugh.  We also contemplated the possibility of being arrested and getting to visit a Vietnamese prison had we actually brought harm to the taxi driver in our attempt to escape (picture the Thai prison in the second installment of Bridget Jones' Diary).  Thank goodness that God was watching over us and none of our worst fears were realized.  Needless to say, we took VinaSun taxis for the remainder of our stay.


We rushed out of class a bit early on Tuesday afternoon and picked up our garments before sitting down for a fantastic dinner at an Italian restaurant near the tailor shop.  The food was terrific--fresh and home-made (you could see people making pasta by hand when you walked by the kitchen)--and we met a lovely Italian man who made some amazing dessert recommendations.  Hearing Italian spoken in Ho Chi Minh City was pretty fun, especially since I was planning to start my online class when I got back to Seoul.

Our dresses!

The only thing left to do before we left Vietnam was to pick up our luggage, grab a quick shower, and make our way to the airport (yes, a final cab ride).  Our flight left around midnight so we had a few extra hours to spend shopping in the airport before we departed for Seoul.  We arrived in Korea around 7am and by the time we made it back to the SFS campus the only thing I could think to do was call my parents and go to bed!  Surprisingly, my dad laughed when I shared the taxi story and my students have taken great joy in telling people that their teacher was "kidnapped" by a taxi driver in Ho Chi Minh despite my best efforts to remind them that I did make it safely out of the taxi.  


I'm now thoroughly recovered from the trip to Ho Chi Minh and I returned having learned a great deal more about traveling and about myself.  I am glad I had the opportunity to take this trip with Ruth and Stephanie, but I'm quite satisfied to explore other destinations around Asia outside of Vietnam in the future.  I realized how easy it is to take what you have for granted and I was very thankful to get into a taxi in Seoul and feel confident that I would make it safely to my destination.  I was also very happy to see drivers obeying traffic rules!  My life in Seoul, and the States, is monumentally easy compared to the lives of people who live in developing nations and I know that I am truly blessed to be where I am!

Rest and Relaxation

We had one final day, which happened to be Easter Sunday, before our course started and we decided to make it day of rest and relaxation at the hotel.  We got up later than the days before, got ready a bit more leisurely, and went down to breakfast.  Stephanie and Ruth decided to make spa appointments for the afternoon and we all headed up to the roof of the hotel to enjoy the pool.  Since I don't swim (or I should say, I don't know how to swim), I opted for a lounge chair in the sun.  About twenty or thirty minutes after I took the sunny spot I was feeling the full effects of the sun and decided the shade would be a better place from which to read and write postcards.  I should note that the pool was on the 25th floor of the hotel and from this height you could still hear the traffic and honking from below.  Here are a couple of shots of the city I took from way up above:

The other ladies swam and before they got out I opted to sit on the edge with my legs in the water and chat.  Being a science teacher who knows full well about radiation, I should have been smart and lathered up with sun screen.  As you can imagine, the burn started to appear minutes after we left the pool deck.  My thirty minutes in the sun, plus time spent on the pool's edge turned my white Oregon skin lobster red.  Overall, my legs were worse off and after examining the damage in the hotel room I was glad I hadn't scheduled an appointment for a massage!  


It was nice to have a couple of hours to myself to start a new book (Frances Mayes' A Year in the World) and take a nap.  In fact, it was really nice to just have a down day.  Usually when I'm in a new place I feel a sort of obligation to spend every free moment sightseeing, but this trip reinforced the notion that it is okay not to see and do everything!  I think I'll probably be applying that to vacations in the future, especially in sunny Asian countries.


When Ruth and Steph got back from the spa we decided to go out for an early dinner at the new Hard Rock Cafe (this is pretty much a staple for me in any city).  This particular Hard Rock has a full stage for bands to perform and we saw advertisements for a high school battle of the bands that would take place there sometime in May--how cool is that! 

I think I've been to the Hard Rock Cafe in nearly every country I've visited!

The rest of the afternoon and evening was spent watching My Life in Ruins, Junior Master Chef, and Wit in our hotel room--we fully appreciated having some english channels that aren't available in Korea:).  On Monday morning our course was to begin and we wanted to be up bright and early.

Cooking up a Storm!

Okay, so I've been a little lax in updating the blog with the rest of my visit to Vietnam.  So, here's a synopsis of our incredible second day in Ho Chi Minh City.  As we searched for ideas for things to see and do in HCM, Stephanie suggested taking a cooking class.  Despite the fact that I have a chronically unhappy digestive system, I checked out the menu and figured I could customize my creation so I could also enjoy some tasty Vietnamese food.  In my opinion, the class was a bargain and for an extra $5 we signed up for the optional trip to the market where we would procure the ingredients for our class alongside our chef.  This turned out to be one of the best days of our trip!


We met up with several other participants in our class at Ben Tahn market in the center of Ho Chi Minh.  From what I can remember we socialized with a lady on holiday from Australia, an American who had relocated to Vietnam with her French boyfriend, and a group of folks from one of the Nordic countries (we think).  This wasn't my first trip to a farmer's market (I've been in the States and shopped open markets in Seoul and Paris), this was, however, the most shocking.  I think the best way I can explain the experience is to say that I was on sensory overload.  There were so many options to choose from and beautiful produce abounded.  Had I been shopping alone, I would have been literally spinning in circles trying to decide what I wanted!  I saw fruits and vegetables that were completely unknown to me.  I also saw marine life and amphibians displayed in ways that were beyond my imagination, along with bits and pieces of animals that don't usually make it to the supermarket.  Here's a taste of the sights we took in at the market...

These stalls are shaded to beat the heat of the day.

Shellfish galore!

Incredibly beautiful produce!

Transacting business

A not so pleasant sight--headless, skinless froggies meeting their end.  The ladies in the back were preparing a new bunch of frogs by whacking them against the pavement.  I could hardly stand hearing the process, so I moved on quickly.

A creative way of packaging the crab.

More gorgeous produce!

These certainly were fresh fish!  One even managed to escape the pan while we standing nearby.

Onions, cucumbers, tomatoes, potatoes...

The parts that don't generally make it to the meat department in a US supermarket--brains (bottom left), intestines, liver, kidneys, and more intestines (which according to Stephanie were "very clean").

Bits and pieces of pig.

All sorts of fruits--including many I had never seen before.

More fresh fish!  We stopped here for prawns for our spring rolls.

I have to admit, it was somewhat unsettling to see where my food was coming from.  Developing countries, like Vietnam, do not necessarily have first rate sanitation processes and I witness some stomach churning sights.  I'll spare you the details, but as we left the market I wondered if this would be the day that I would acquire a foreign bacteria.  Thankfully, this never happened!  With our chef at the helm, we grabbed a cab and headed over to the cooking school which is situated above a very posh restaurant, and the fun began!


We gathered around a huge table where we found a plateful of fresh ingredients from our market outing.  Our first task was learning to make proper spring rolls and our chef led us through each step.  So as not to forget when I tried to make them later, I photographed the process.  Enjoy!

Our fantastic chef, Huong.  He was quite a character!

Peanut dipping sauce for the spring rolls--it is so delicious!

Step 1:  Wet rice paper wrapper and place a bunch of lettuce in one corner (if indeed a circle had corners)

Step 2:  Pile on top of lettuce a small bit of bean sprouts, thai basil, and rice noodles.

Step 3:  Add fresh mint and strategically place prawns in a heart shape with the beautiful pink side down.

Step 4:  Fold the other sides (go with me here) in to the center and carefully roll burrito style so that everything is tucked in.  Stop when you get to the prawns and add two chive stalks for color.

See, everyone's doing it!

Delicious spring rolls all ready to be served with the fabulous dipping sauce!

Proof that even I can do this!

We turned this plate of drab greens...

...into this fab salad!

My salad.  I have to admit, I ate only a few tentative bites after the market experience.

Our cooking class menu for the day.

This is where we turned up the heat and started a bit of actual "cooking".

Each of us  had an individual burner and wok.

Sauteing veggies.

Fried rice ready to be carefully wrapped up and steamed in a lotus leaf.

Steph and I with our final presentation of the fried rice.  What an accomplishment!

The cooking class filled a good part of our day, but we had more ambitious plans for the afternoon.  We all had purchased fabric at the market the day before and we wanted to get things custom tailored.  Our hotel made a recommendation and off we went to the city center in search of a shop.  It was a trial and error process from the moment we located the suggested tailor and we ended up taking our material to two other shops to get what we wanted.  Our final creations were ready to be picked up on Tuesday evening right before we headed off to the airport (photos to come)!  It had been another hot and busy day, so we grabbed another round of pho for dinner and headed back to the hotel to relax before bed.  Before we made it back to the room, we decided to go check out the shopping center adjacent to the hotel.  We all needed water and after such a great cooking class we thought it would be fun to take back some of the Vietnamese ingredients so we could reproduce the recipes.  Plus, we decided to surprise the science department to some yummy spring rolls when we returned to SFS.  The grocery store reminded me of what I had seen in Europe and we were able to stock up on rice noodles, rice papers, and fish sauce.  Always with camera in hand, these are a few pictures I snapped as we wandered around and on the way back to the hotel.  

A statue near the market.

More crazy attempts at crossing the street with motorbikes a bit too close for comfort.

Yes, even the Colonel is known in Vietnam.  Ga is the word for chicken (and marriage, depending on how you pronounce it).

Chaos and interesting wiring solutions.

Motorbikes are multi purpose instruments--you can use them for driving and sleeping!

I've become accustomed to a pretty hectic and busy lifestyle in Seoul, but being a tourist in a foreign city was absolutely exhausting.  I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've gone to bed before 10pm in a long time, but that sleep was so sweet.