Culture Shock Sets In

Last night I arrived in Okayama, a bit afraid of what I would encounter here, but optimistic that I would be able to cope with the vast differences I knew I would face. In my mind, visiting Japan would be easier than living in Korea. I can tell you that after just one day my preconceptions were entirely wrong…being a foreigner in Seoul is simple compared to this. I am so grateful to have this unique opportunity so please don’t misread this post, it is simply a collection of my experiences and feelings—sometimes experiences and emotions are difficult…sometimes you just need to cry, even when you are in the midst of a really cool experience or visiting an amazing place. Tonight, I need tears and sleep in order to press on through the next three days. I’m having a moment…

My first night was fairly sleepless, but this is par for the course when I am staying in a new place. I got up around 9am, showered, and sat with the family to have breakfast. I did not expect to be served miso soup, rice, vegetables, and an egg dish. Thankfully, yogurt and bread were my salvation. Everyone was fairly shocked at how little I ate and that I couldn’t or wouldn’t try everything put in front of me. I didn’t want to be a difficult guest, but I also didn’t want to spend this entire trip huddled in the corner of the bathroom.

Masae took Kahori and ran to the hospital for about an hour and as she walked out the door my optimism about this trip began to fade. I was left to watch television in silence with her mother and husband who spoke little to me while Masae was out. I truly breathed a sigh of relief when Masae returned and we packed up to go visit Kurashiki, a nearby city where Masae’s sister and her family live. The little city is built around a small river and a canal system that feed the plots of rice crops—it is really a sweet town.

Our first stop was a Shinto shrine we stumbled across. Before entering the shrine we needed to purify ourselves properly. I had read about this in my guidebook, but was a bit timid to be the first so Masae’s mother taught us all (even the Japanese ones of us) the correct etiquette for washing our hands and our mouth before proceeding. She also gave us coins to leave as an offering to the gods who will now hopefully bless us with good luck.

Shinto shrine in Kurashiki

Me in front of the torii (shrine gate) at the shrine in Kurashiki

Purifying ourselves before entering the shrine

Where we placed our offering

I love these lanterns

When we walked down from the shrine we found ourselves in the midst of the “tourist area”. There are shops selling pottery, glassware, and souvenirs everywhere and I really wanted to purchase a piece of Bizen-yaki. I found a cool vase and Masae’s mother demanded that she purchase it as a gift for me--I’m really excited to take my unique souvenir home to decorate my apartment. We continued walking and shopping until we reached the river. In a cute little souvenir store Kahori chose a little monster for herself and I browsed at other mementos but somehow held back from spending much of my yen. When we approached a bridge over the river Toshiaki produced a bag of round pellets that I discovered to be fish food. Tossing handfuls of the food into the water stirred up a frenzy of large, hungry koi fish and was a fun amusement.

Cute shop

Traditional boat in the river

Doesn't this look like fun?

Fish feeding bridge

Masae feeding the koi fish

Hungry, hungry fish!

Here fishie fishie

Since we had eaten a late breakfast, our lunch was actually dinner in my mind. Masae’s sister drove us to the shopping mall near Kurashiki where we ate at an Italian restaurant. I was able to order the sauce on the side (after some serious explanation from the Japanese speakers in the group) and really enjoyed my pasta with salmon and cream sauce. Mmmmmm….nothing like eating Italian food in Japan.

When we were finished with our meal we walked the mall a bit and then made a stop at the grocery store to stock up for the next day (apparently people tend to shop every day here). I scored some bread, bananas, bottled water, and a few other “staples” in my IBS diet and as we went to check out I began to feel an overwhelming feeling of panic, emotion, and regret. I was struggling to hold back tears, feeling exhausted from a terrible night of sleep, and wishing that I could get the heck out of here and go back to something comfortable! The feelings just got stronger on the way home and during our stop at Hiroe's home in Kurashiki--it was all I could do to stay up until 8pm when I excused myself and went to bed.

Toshiaki, me, Hiroe, and Masae

As I laid there hoping to fall asleep, a thought train ran through my head. I lamented about feeling like an outsider, not understanding the conversations going on around me, and wishing there was someone else here I could talk to. I remember my assistant principal Kim telling me about her first months in Japan and how difficult they were because she rarely spoke to a native English speaker for the first three months of her experience. She said that she felt isolated and challenged in ways she never had been before. Though we’re talking just one day here, I think I caught a glimpse of what that may have been like and I didn’t enjoy it at all. As the thoughts raged, the headache that had started earlier as a small throb had progressed exponentially and by midnight I was on my second dose of meds and had maxed out the 24-hour limit. I spent the most miserable night of perhaps my entire life wishing for sleep…and home.