Eat, Pray, Love

It's passed eleven o'clock and I just walked in the door from seeing Eat, Pray, Love. My best intentions of finishing up the grading on a class worth of lab reports went by the wayside hours ago when I decided to abandon the papers on the living room floor and head down the hill. I had heard mixed reviews of the movie--some said I would be disappointed since I had read Elizabeth Gilbert's book, but I was determined to see the film version anyway (especially since I moved just before the film released in the States and I've been waiting for the Korean debut for two months!).

Going to the movies in Seoul is pretty comparable to seeing a show in the States...except your english language movie has the added bonus of Korean subtitles. Oh, and there are assigned seats in the theater. This really wasn't problematic for our group as we made up half of the audience. Anyway, let me get to the reason I'm writing about this in the first place.

Nearly two years ago I selected Eat, Pray, Love as the first book for my book club and I was surprised to find that I connected with the story even though I had definitely never experienced life in quite the same way as the author. After spending nearly two hours talking about the book with my diverse group of book club ladies, I found myself humbled by the sharing of experiences and emotions that took place as each person talked about their connection to the story and events that paralleled the author's life from their own. I walked away from our first meeting with tidbits of wisdom I could infuse into my own life and feeling more compassion for and connectedness to each person in the group. Now that the movie had arrived in Korea, I wanted to see Julia Roberts live the author's experiences in front of me to remind me of how I was moved by the story in the first place. Although I left the theater exhausted, I arrived home with the feeling that my life in Seoul is lacking in three key areas...those just happen to be eating, praying, and loving.

Most of you know about the eating part already and living with IBS in South Korea has not been any easier than living with this nasty ailment in the States. Don't worry, I'm not starving over here! My favorite part of Eat, Pray, Love most definitely took place in Italy. As I watched Julia/Elizabeth connecting with the country as she ate, I experienced overwhelming feelings of longing and jealousy. I MISS GOOD FOOD! You don't realize how large a role food plays in your life until your options are severely limited. Think about the time you spend with friends and family that doesn't in some way involve food...going out to dinner, cooking together, chatting over a coffee... I just feel like I'm missing out on so much of the culture here because of my inability to eat Korean food (however I do think I'd pass on kimchi even if I did have an iron stomach ). Traveling to Japan was such a gift because I could try many more foods knowing they wouldn't cause my digestive system to spontaneously combust (in case you didn't know, Korean food is notoriously spicy). There are so many places I'm just dying to visit and experience...unfortunately my experience just won't involve much adventurous eating.

When I first read Eat, Pray, Love I felt least connected to Gilbert's path to finding God since it was so different and more radical than my own. Although I cannot imagine staying at an ashram run by a guru, reading the book did encourage me to be more open-minded and accepting of others who have beliefs different from my own. The real transformation has come from teaching kids who hail from such diverse backgrounds--working here has opened my heart in a whole new way to my students who experience God in such a wide variety of ways. Overall, I suppose things in the praying department have actually improved since my departure from the States. I feel the constant presence of God here--truly it is difficult not to feel God in this place. I can talk to students about their faith and beliefs...and I don't have to worry about whether or not it is okay to talk to them about how God is working in my life. Thursday afternoons spent with my discipleship group is a high point in the week as I watch the girls in their spiritual walk and am challenged to examine my own. I find myself in prayer much more than ever before, listening for God's voice in the silence. My next mission will be to find a church home.

I suppose that brings us to love. Wow, this is always a difficult subject to approach especially because I'm not getting any younger here! I cannot tell you how many people are back home thinking that I am going to meet Mr. Right over here in Korea. This may come as a shock, but I did not move halfway across the globe in search of my perfect match. My chances of landing a man were much greater back home where I was amongst people who speak my language and understand the culture in which I was raised. I'm certainly not ruling anything out, but at the moment I have found contentment in my singleness. I will publicly admit that I had a moment of weakness a few weeks ago and decided to follow suit with many of the other single ladies around here...I signed up for e-Harmony. Since I'm payed up for three months I'm going to make the most of it and see who is out there, though I am not fully convinced that the man God has chosen for me will be found via the internet. Then again, I've heard God has a sense of humor, so who knows?! There have most definitely been seasons in my life where I have longed to be married, to make a life with someone, and to have a family. This just doesn't seem to be one of those seasons. While I still have these desires within me, they are not what drive me right now. There is no mistaking what my heart presently wants--to explore the world, to have incredible experiences, to meet new people, to build friendships in a new place, and to let God prepare me to love in a special way. As in the movie, I think it is possible that I need this time to get to know myself thoroughly, to forgive my faults, and to prepare me (a type-A control freak) for the unpredictability and unbalance that comes when two lives join.

I haven't been overseas long, but I know that my life is changing. I am getting a full immersion course in independence, yet I am learning about submission to and reliance on someone other than myself. Sometimes it takes two hours watching some else's life re-created on a movie screen before I am able to acknowledge the areas where growth is occurring...or those where there is heartache or disappointment. No matter how it comes about, I am uncovering emotions that haven't surfaced for a long time and right now I'm actually prepared to feel and face them...and talk and write about them too. I think that's a pretty good start, don't you?